Shakespearean
by Indipindy
Summary: Modern AU. Eren and his friends/enemies(JeanXD) are part of a theatre company run by Erwin. They are touring a play of Romeo and Juliet when Eren meets the producer for the first time, only to find out he's a 'grumpy clean-freak midget with bad people skills, but he's ok' as Hanji puts it. Ereri. T for Levi's dirty mouth. CANCELLED
1. Chapter 1

"Romeo! Romeo! Where for art thou Romeo?" Krista's angelic voice echoed through the full theatre, as Ymir waited for her que below the balcony. It was the first night of their production tour of Romeo and Juliet, and so far, the theatre company had made big bucks. People were already booking seats at the last performance, when they were only halfway through the first one! Keith Shadis, their director, had metaphorically beaten the rookie actors into submission, acting the play as fluently as though they were living the lives of the real Romeo and Juliet.

"I don't see why Shadis didn't give me Romeo. I mean, I'm having Krista as my wife someday!" Reiner hissed. The rest of the cast were backstage, listening to the performance. Because of the acoustics of the theatre, you could hear it clearly even behind the stage.

"Pft. I think you have to compete with Ymir for that privelidge," Eren scoffed, rolling his Caribbean green eyes at the taller man. "Just be thankful our fiery-tempered Yandere Tybalt isn't after Krista too!" He said, motioning with his head towards Mikasa, who was reading a book absent-mindedly. She wasn't in the scene.

"Ha! I agree with that one, Eren!" Connie, who was acting as Peter the servant, laughed. Beside ahim the 'Nurse', Sasha, was shovelling down a packet of crisps like no tomorrow.

"Sasha, stop eating. You'll get crumbs on you're face, and you're in this scene. You should be waiting for your que." Annie, their Lady Montague, growled, her icy-blue eyes looking straight at the other girl's brown ones. Sasha shivered and gave Connie her chips, who took them gladly.

"Stop sitting around, you lot. Eren, Mercutio's lines aren't gonna practice themselves. I'll find Armin. He's Benvolio, so he's only a few scenes away." Mikasa put down her book and walked out, most likely to the lighting crew, where Jean -and Armin when he wasn't acting- would make sure the spotlight stayed on the characters speaking onstage.

"It's kind of ironic how she always protective of me, yet in this play she ends up killing me and calling me names." Eren said quietly. Bertholdt chuckled and Reiner smiled. Sasha got up for her que a few seconds later and called to Juliet. She didn't appear in the scene excactly, just called Krista from backstage.

After many scenes, half of the main characters were dead and the performance was finally done. At that point, Eren was relaxing when suddenly Shadis burst in.

"Get up, you dim-witted half-brained maggots! Get on stage and bow!" He hissed. On the outside Eren was quivering from what felt like fear, but also excitement. It had been his first live performance, and it signified many more to come- Shadis had organised for them to perform at a large theatre in what looked like every single country in Europe, but they also had a performance in nearly half of the states of Amaica, and they had five in Austarlia.

Such a long tour was unprecedented in the thespian community, but after the verbal beatings they had endured against Shadis, all these performances seemed like pieces of cake, just waiting to be eaten. If he told Sasha about his cake analogy she would surely drool all over him, so Eren kept it to himself.

Eren bowed what felt like ten times, his arms interlocked with Armin's on his right and Mikasa's on his left. His brunette hair was wet with sweat, from under the hot lighting onstage, but it was still, somehow, messy and ruffled. He had his biggest grin on his face as he made eye contact with a few people. Everyone he say was cheering for them. It was exhilarating and exhausting at the same time.

After the claps and cheers died down they filed offstage. Even after all the training, Eren had not been anywhere near prepared for the experience of a live performance with such a large audience. He was surprised Armin hadn't stuttered on his lines or something.

Backstage they changed out of their costumes and into dresses and suits- it was the opening party of their production, and they would likely end up speaking to some rich people and representatives of companies, so Shadis himself had picked their outfits. He knew just how 'uncultured' Sasha's dress code was, obviously.

"I don't like this dress." Mikasa said quietly as Eren, Armin and her were walking out of the dressing rooms. "It's hard for me to move." Mikasa had a knee-length dress which restricted her leg action. She didn't look very happy about it. The dress was purple and she had a red ribbon around her waist, as well as her red scarf around her neck in the chilly night air.

"Come on Eren, let's go find the others." Armin suggested and dragged Eren, who in turn dragged Mikasa, to where the other actors were talking.

"What I'm surprised about is that I didn't forget any of my lines!" Connie laughed and Sasha patted him on the back. Reiner, Lord Capulet, chuckled and had his hand on Bertholdt, Lord Montague's, shoulder. Lady Capulet(Mina, a girl with black, long hair in loose pigtails) was giggling to herself.

"Hey, you guys, where do you think the others are?" Eren asked. Mina turned to him.

"Krista and Ymir are in a photo shoot. I think Annie's over there talking to her dad," Mina pointed to where they were, "And Jean and Marco are getting the stage and props put away with the rest of the team. I wonder where our producer is, though. Shadis said he'd bring the producer to see us at some point tonight."

The theatre company had never met the producer. Seriously, they didn't even know his name. Apparently it was the producer who chose the modern theme, and he had told the costumer- who they had also never met- to do it in a more modern style. And so, Ymir and Krista ended up wearing jeans and skirts and t-shirts, rather than traditional Elizabethan clothing.

"I wonder what he's like. I'd really like to know his reasoning for the modern theme." Mikasa said quietly.

"I agree. I'm not sure why he told Shadis to give us such a long tour either." Bertholdt agree with a shy grin. "I mean, we are just rookie performers..."

"You'll find out later. Come here, my dad wants to meet you." Annie had returned, a man by her side. He had blonde hair and he wore glasses. He also had a broad smile.

"Hello, Mr Leonhardt!" Armin shook the man's hand while Annie rolled her eyes. Mikasa went and stood next to her, watching the scene unfold from the sidelines.

"Hello! You're Armin, right? The clever one?" Mr Leonhardt asked.

"Well, I guess you could say that, but I'm not that clever..." Armin said modestly.

"Don't be stupid, Armin! You're, like, really clever! Sasha went up and shook Annie's dad's hand.

"Ah. Sasha, the one who loves food." He nodded to the bowlful potato salad that Shas was eating.

"You got that one right! I'm Connie."

"And I'm Reiner, this is Bertholdt. Though you already know us, I want to be polite."

"I'm Mina!"

"And you are?" Annie's dad asked Eren. "You played Mercutio, right? So you're... Please help me out here, I'm not good with names."

"I'm Eren."

"Oh, I rememember now! The one with green eyes who's in a hurry to die." Mr Leonhardt chuckled, "How ever did you get that nickname?"

"Well-"

"He's the only one of us who dares defy Shadis! He never takes any acting tips and he argues when someone tells him what to do. That's why he's a suicidal bastard." Jean barged into the conversation.

"Jean, it's rude to barge in on someone else's conversation before asking first!" Marco, who was just behind him, scolded, "He's really sorry." He directed that at Eren, who was seething.

"People will start calling you a suicidal bastard if you keep saying things that make me want to punch you in the face," Eren growled. Jean grinned. Mikasa put her hand on Erens shoulder, deciding to step in.

"Eren, this is a party. Let's enjoy it. Ignore him, please!" Armin pleaded. Erin sighed and backed away.

"Hannah! Franz! Get a room!" Ymir's voice could be heard as she approached. The couple in question were across the room from them and making out. Hannah pulled away, her face as deep a shade of red as Mikasa's scarf.

"You two, how did the photo shoot go?" Comnie asked, reluctantly giving his packet of crisps to Sasha. The brunnette greedily gobbled them down, getting crumbs on her face. Connie sighed and wiped them off.

"It was really fun! Do you want to see some of the photos?" Krista smiled and Reiner fake fainted. Bertholdt caught him as he fell before putting him back on his feet.

"These are really cool! What camera do you think the photographer used?" It was no secret that Armin had a fascination with the art of photography, even though he was more use as an actor. At least, when he played Benvolio- the name literally meant good-wisher in Latin, which was something you could see when you looked past Armin's brainiac-ness.

"Why don't you ask him? He's probably somewhere here. Don't expect me to know." Ymir told him.

"None of you half-wits are going anywhere but following me. Hurry up, maggots!" Shades growled from behind them before walking away. All the actors jumped up and followed him. Jean and Marco, even though they weren't actors, followed as well.

They were led out of the party room backstage. There was a man and a woman sitting in chairs, surrounded by the boxes of props. The woman a red-brown hair and she wore rectangular glasses. Her hair was in a ponytail and her eyes were acorn-brown. She had a broad grin as she looked at them one by one. Eren thought she looked kinda crazy.

The man had raven-black hair and an undercut. He had cool, grey uncaring eyes that looked each of the up and down without any apparent interest, more like disgust. His face looked like he was in his late twenties, but his eyes made him look older. And, surprisingly, he looked _handsome._ Eren quickly looked away from his intimidating gaze.

"Alright you dim-witted maggots, this is the producer and the costume designer. You unworthy half-brains, pay attention!" Shadis roared. Even Eren, who usually tried his best to defy Shadis, stood straight.

"So you lot are the actors? I'm Hanji, your costume designer! You played the nurse, right? Did you like your outfit?" Hanji got up and grabbed the unsuspecting Sasha by the collar, with seemingly no regard for personal space.

"Uh.. I think it suited the character, but I felt a bit uncomfortable wearing it..." Sashay said, her eyes wide with the sudden intrusion.

"Hanji, let go of the girl. From what I've heard, she would've been happiest if you gave her a dress made of food." The man remarked.

"That wouldn't be good, because then she'd eat it all!" Connie whispered in Eren's ear. Eren tried to stifle a laugh, but it was no use.

"Is something funny?" The man turned to him suddenly, "You played Mercutio as I recall."

"Well, it's just, if you gave Sasha a dress made of food, she's more likely to eat it than wear it!" Reiner burst out laughing, along with Jean, Ymir and Bertholdt. Armin and Marco chuckled quietly, Annie and Mikasa had small smiles on their faces and Sasha was bright red.

"I certainly wouldn't put it past her." Shadis grumbled. The man, however, gave Eren a glare.

"Very funny, Yeager. I'm Levi, and from now on can whoever said on cleaning this dump actually do their job?"

"Uh, that's us, sir..." Macro said feebly, pointing to him and Jean, "Along with the rest of the stage team."

"Well, get your asses in gear. Next time I come down here this place better be spotless. It's disgusting. There's cobwebs, for gods sake. And brat," he turned to Eren, "It's now your job to check when they're done. If it isn't clean, and I find out you let it pass, you're the one getting on your knees and scrubbing it. That clear?"

"Crystal, sir." Eren actually felt very intimidated. Armin, who was standing on his left, was quaking in fear. Levi got up and just walked out.

"Oh, don't mind him! He's just a grumpy, midget clean freak who will give you nightmares if you don't do as he says. Who else nearly wet their pants when they first met him?"

Hanji, Connie, Sasha, Armin, Bertholdt, Mina and Marco all put their hands up.

"Well at least we didn't actually wet our pants, hmm? I'd best go. I'll see you guys tomorrow night! Me and Levi were in the crowd, by the way. Eren, even though he won't admit it, he admired your portrayal of Mercutio. Same with you, Mikasa, but of Ttbalt. Have fun, kiddos!"

With that, Hanji ran upstairs.

"Maggots, go home. The party's ending. Release your lines or something. Now!" Shades ordered and we all scrabbled out of the room. We were all silent until Mikasa said,

"He was shorter than I thought he would be. But that was unfair, giving you an extra job, Eren! I just wanna puns that midget!"

"I do hope you don't mean Levi." A voice came from to the side. There stood a tall blond man with big eyebrows. Armin's ears went red and Eren sighed. Erwin was the head of the theatre company, and Armin had a giant crush on him.

"Of course I mean him! He called Eren a brat!"

"Really? I'd be happy. That means he won't kill you." Erwin continued, "He gives people he doesn't mind too much nicknames. To him I'm 'Eyebrows' and Hanji is 'Shitty Four-Eyes' or just 'Four-Eyes'. The earlier on in the time that you know him he gives you a nickname, the less he hates you. He hates everyone to some extent. It's just Levi."

"That's kinda mean..." Krista commented. Reiner swooned, and Bertholdt caught him. Ymir chuckled and enveloped the thoroughly blushing Krista into a hug.

"That's just Krista for you, and it's why you'll someday be my wife!" Ymir exclaimed. Everyone looked away as Ymir gave her girlfriend a kiss.

"I'm not sure he likes me at all. He's making me take Jean's job of inspecting the cleaning up when I'm an actor, not part of the stage crew!"

"If you don't believe me, fine. But either way, give Levi a chance. He's not a people person."

"We can see that." Annie commented dryly. Erwin laughed and left them to their own business. All the actors parted ways until it was only Armin, Eren and Mikasa walking along the corridor to their hotel rooms. Their rooms were all on the same corridor, but the trio had theirs right at the back. Apparently some of the extras were sharing rooms to cut costs, but as actors Shadis had ordered rooms for them.

"Do you think Hanji really meant the thing about me acting?" Eren asked Armin after Mikasa had gone to her own room.

"Well, you act very differently to the rest of us. It's like you're saying the words on the spot, rather than from memory, and you move like Mercutio would move. When you're on stage you really are Mercutio. I think even a famous actor would be impressed."

"Armin, don't say that. I'm not that good..."

"You may not believe it, but you are. Night, Eren." Armin said, retreating to his room. Eren then went into his own.

Needless to say, Eren had a lot to think about that night.


	2. Chapter 2

"Eren! Is this clean?" Marco asked for what felt like the fifth time, adding, "You keep zoning out, I'm worried."

"Wah? Oh! It's nothing, just... Yeah, nothing. Really, what were you asking again?" Eren gave an embarrassed smile and rubbed the back of his head. Nervous habit that he couldn't shake, so he didn't try.

"Do you think I cleaned this right?" Marco asked tentatively. "I won't ask what's on your mind, but I suggest you at least tell Armin or Mikasa."

"I'm pretty sure it's clean, you may wanna get that mark out though... And yeah, I'm thinking about telling Armin, but he would tell Mikasa, then Mikasa would freak..." Erne looked from side to side, and noted that nobody else was there.

"You can tell me if you want." Marco smiled. It seemed like very one always vented to Marco, the rookie stage crew leader who dreamed of being and actor and was understudy to Armin's part of Benvolio.

"It's complicated, but.. I'm not sure I hate Levi. I mean, everyone hated him, far as I can see, after he made us all scrub the backstage last night..." It had been a week since they first met Levi, and the whole theatre company was bending over backwards for the clean-freak's OCD.

"I don't think anyone hated him, really, Eren..." Marco patted him on the shoulder. "Except Mikasa, anyway!" They both laughed at that.

"It's more than that. I just... Don't know."

"You should try to get to know him better. Hey, we're going on the ferry to our next location on the tour in a couple days. Why don't you hang out with him then? It'll be at least an hour's journey."

"I don't think 'hang out' is the appropriate phrase, Marco."

"What about a date?" Eren squealed like a girl as the face of Hanji Zoe came too close for comfort. Eren's face was deep red with a blush.

"N-not a-"

"Alright! It's settled. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone! Levi hasn't had a boyfriend for, like yeaaaaaaaaars, literally! It's a perfect match! I SHIP IT!"

"Hanji! Stop shouting!" Erne clasped a hand over Hanji's mouth as she went on blubbering about Levi's lacklustre love-life. Meanwhile, Marco's jaw was wide. Suddenly they heard footsteps. They all froze.

"Eren, why are you smothering our costume designer? Idiot!" Jean leaped on Eren, releasing Hanji.

"- It'll be a great experience for Levi to finally go on a date in so long!"

"It's not a- gerrof, horseface! What's your problem?!"

"Please, guys calm down! Jean..." Marco made a puppy dog face. Jean sighed.

"Fine. Now what's this about Levi and dates? Are you setting the midget up with someone?" Jean got up off Eren and held out his hand to let the brunette up. Eren stared at it for a moment before taking it and standing with his friend/enemy(frenemy)'s help.

"Yep! We're setting Levi up with Eren." Hanji blurted.

"How do you know midget even gives two shits about suicidal bastard here?" Jean said, rolling his eyes. Marco gasped at Jean.

"Jean! Don't swear so off-heandedly!"

"Fine, fine. Come on, coo-coo fan girl, stop fan girling and answer the question."

"It isn't really a-" One look from Hanji's crazy brown eyes behind her rectangular glasses shut him up.

"Yep, it's a date! You know in fandoms like, when you ship some people together, you mix their names together to say it quicker. Rather than 'Mission ErenXLevi' we could have a code word that nobody who wasn't in on it could guess."

"What do you suggest?" Jean asked.

"Levi has two things people call him- Levi and Rivaille. The second is for business, but if we use it in the code name nobody would figure it out!"

"That sounds like a good idea..." Marco murmured. Jean had Eren in a headlock so he couldn't protest.

"So we could either do Ri-ren or ere-ri. Which do you like best?"

"We could use both. Riren for when we're talking on the phone and Ereri when face-to-face." Jean suggested.

"Why?" Hanji looked like she seriously didn't understand, something Eren hadn't seen her like before.

"I dunno. I guess it would confuse anyone who eavesdropped."

"Yeah, I don't think Mikasa would be happy to learn what you're doing..." Eren croaked. A few minutes prior Jean had let him go.

"Just so you know Eren, we're doing this whether you like it pr not. But I'd like your cooperation, as it would make my job a lot easier." Hanji pleaded, smiling and kneeling down to have eye contact with Eren, as he was sitting in a chair.

Eren stared at her for a few minutes before sighing, "...Fine. I'll help you. Just don't interfere too much. And, whatever you do, don't let Mikasa find out."

Eren dreaded what Mikasa would do if she discovered he was letting people set him up with their grumpy, short producer.

"But what exactly do you have in mind for hooking Ereri up?" Jean asked, already using the code name.

"Well, I think..." And so Hanji told them her plan.

"Are you sure it'll work?" Marco asked hesitantly.

"Of course! You just need to stick to the plan to the letter."

"I have a bad feeling about this." Eren muttered.

"Pft. Just stick to the fucking plan like Hanji said and your good." Jean scoffed.

"Even so, Jean... Lots of things could go wrong!"

"Pull yourself together, Mercutio! The Ereri ship will sail!" Hanji used her hand in a sailing motion. She looked like a child on Christmas. Eren smiled nervously.

"She's fucking crazy, Jean." He hissed in his frenemy's ear frantically.

"I know. But I can't wait to see her hook you up." Jean whispered back. Erun glared at him. This was why Jean was frenemy. Friend one moment, enemy the next. It was frustrating.

"What are you scheming down there, shitting glasses? Oh, and brat and horse face are there too." A shadow descended upon them of a very short, very and angry, Levi.

A/n: I'm so sorry for not updating, but I am a very bad person so that's life.

~Indigo


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